Looser...

Yeah. That's me.



Well...Hopefully! No no, I'm not having an identity crisis, (not that I'm above that, am I? haha) But, I'm trying to loose some weight. Oh yes... the horrible, awful weight loss roller coaster. I'm on it. Yeah baby.

So, I'm hoping to ride this roller coaster for a little while. I would love to loose, say, 20-25 lbs. But, realistically, I don't know that I'll get there. Call me faithless. Perhaps that's why I won't get there? But, I think the deeper answer is, that I don't want to aim so high, that it seems impossible, and thus, give up. So, I have a goal, to get down hopefully 10 lbs, for now.

I am at the heaviest I have ever been, not pregnant, and sometimes, pregnant too. This is what I weighed when I gave birth to Levi, probably Kayla too, I don't remember.

Anyways, the truth of it is, I'd like to feel better. To exercise for my sanity, not for my vanity (thanks Joce, love that phrase)

But, I need to see some results too. So I'm trying. Some days, I'm trying to open that chocolate bar wrapper, haha, but, really, if I could wish myself to skinny... oh yeah.

It's been a month now, on the "coaster". I've been walking/running on my treadmill, and cutting back. And guess what!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I
gained
3
pounds.
Sigh. So back to, vanity girl, not sanity. No no no, wait, the other way around!! Yeah, I've been getting them mixed up sometimes. But, once I saw that 3 pound raise, I had to refocus.
So, I weighed myself a week later. I lost 1 pound!! Finally, yay!
Seriously, in my head, loosing that one pound, I feel like a super model. I just have to avoid mirrors to keep my delusional state.
Lets get this into perspective here. 1 pound. Well, compared to the 25 I really need to loose, it's like, a drop in the bucket. But, go get a pound of butter... yeah. Hold that up to your tummy blubber (well, that's what mine is at least) and imagine, that much blubber gone. WOW! That, my friends, is 1 pound. And I for one, am stinking proud of it.
Anyone else wanna ride this coaster with me? It would be kinda fun to know someone else is sweating it out. Perhaps just for your sanity, maybe the vanity is just fine. And, perhaps you're overweight, but, you rather enjoy that comfy cozy extra bit, it's fine, folks, totally fine! We don't all need to be a certain size. I'm short, and a few lbs on my little frame can be hard to carry around after a while.
You need to know. I am at peace with my weight. Ok ok, I'm not, but I am a lot more then I was. It's still me, cushy, or bony. And my beauty is not dependant on my size. But, I wanna have more energy. I wanna feel good. So, I'm giving it a go.
Tune in next week, to find out what the scale says... YIY!