But first, a couple pics!
Who stole the cookie?
Not me?Our little Nathan has been doing his best to act like a 2 yr old. He's busy getting into things and then... learning not to!
Ok, so my what if.... What if... we are approching Christianity a little... backwards. I know, this isn't a new idea, but I've been thinking a lot about all this lately. Anyone who's read my blog for a while knows that I've listened to a bunch of John Bevere stuff lately. He's good, but he freaks me out a little too. Makes me wonder if I'm even a Christian sometimes. What does it really mean to be a Christian anyways?? Cause, honestly, most all of us claiming and thinking we're Christians don't act a lot like Christ. We don't think like Christ and we don't treat others like Christ would. We act like... a bunch of people with ideals and rules that we sometimes follow and always feel guilty that we don't follow enough of.
Anyone else feel like that sometimes?
What does God really want from me? Cause I really stink at being perfect.
I. Can't. Do. It.
I can't. I can't be good enough for Jesus. I can't get it together. I am just so flawed.
Now, I know there's a lot of "pat answers" to these issues. And usually they settled my heart enough to carry on as I was. But not now. I realize from scripture that there is going to be Christians that think they are following Christ and doing His will, and they're not. And He's gonna say He never knew them.
How do we know we're not one of them?
Those folks we're totally confidant they were going to Heaven, and they don't.
I don't know about you, but that rather freaks me out. (yes, thanks John Bevere...)
Well, it got me all to thinking, what does God really want from me. The new and the old testiment both talk about lifestyle choices that please the Lord. The 10 commandments and the fruits of the spirit for example. Really, there's lots of areas in our lives to be working on. Pride, selfishness, generosity, gluttony.
Ugh. And there's so many more too!
But I can't get it, and really, I know salvation is all about repentance, but I probably would be repenting 24/7 if I counted everything.
It's very overwhelming. (but I still will continue to repent!)
Well, I know that the Bible says no, He won't. Because that's the gift of salvation right?
So then, why do the people in the parable think they are saved, but aren't?
Well, for one, I think one of the devil's greatest's tools is deception. The pharisee's thought they were saved, for sure! And really, they probably lived far more holy lives then most of us, at least by appearances. But we all know what Jesus thought of their rightousness!
So as I've hummed and hawed over this, wondering what, besides loving God first, Jesus really wants from us... What is a Christian suppose to look like?!?!?!?!?
Well, I just said it. And you probably all knew that. And I knew that, in my head, but my heart needed to accept it.
He wants us to love him first.
The gospel really is that simple.
Do you ever think of your purpose? Why God planted you here on this earth?
In the begining God did not creat missionarys... or youth pastors... or evangelists...
There wouldn't be any need at the time of creation right?
He created us for fellowship with Him, to love Him and enjoy Him and His creation. That's it.
There's no all american dream (more on that in another post).
No climbing the social ladder.
Just love Him.
I've had trouble grasping that. But Jesus said "My sheep hear my voice and follow me", but, you really gotta know him to recognize his voice!
What I realized is, we try to please God with our life. With the evidence of the fruits of the spirit and all those difficult yet beautiful things the Bible talks about. We try to be worthy of Him.
Hog wash. We're all hog wash!
It's impossible, as Paul said, our rightousness is as filthy rags.
But yet, we still try so hard. We feel so guilty when we can't be what He already knows we can't be.
Here's why it's backwards. It's our love for Him. Our love. We love him, we spend time with Him and pursue Him, and amazingly, He deals with the crap as He see's fit. See, he's faithful that way, even when we're not.
He's still working on me, and will continue to do so. But it's my love for Him that will bring it to pass. Not my own will, then I'm just as good as a pharisee.
I'm realizing more and more He really is passionately pursuing us. Wanting us to know Him. Not just about Him.
I was reading in Duteronomy last night, and after a whole thwack of rules rules rules at the end it says that all this is to love Him (Dut 30, in a few places) .
This is my journey. I'm learning to love and learning to lean. Learning to accept that I really am crap and can't do a lot about it. Learning to let that go and let God deal with me. Learning to stop fretting, and start listening to the voice of the Shephard.
I'm learning guys. These are just my thoughts I'm chewing on. You guys might have this all figured out already. But I don't. Some how the simplicity of God's gift of true and raw love is beyond our understanding.
But I wanted to share what I am learning and thinking on all this. Cause when we focus on the Giver, not the gift everything seems to fall into place.
Lemme know what you think!! I don't claim to have this figured out, if I'm off base somewhere I'm curious to hear your take on it all.
Aw, N. looks cute! :) He's my little buddy now, lol!;) Good reminder, about loving God. I think when we love Him, the other stuff falls into place. Good thoughts!
ReplyDeleteChristine
ps. you need to come this way with the kids for coffee/tea....esp if I'm on my own:)
I always love your musings/ponderings, Sara. It seems that this pursuit of knowing God is more of an adventure than we first suppose it to be. I have traditionally looked at getting to know God as more of a benefit for me, than a benefit to God, but more recently, I see that it is when I am drawn to him, that I become more like him and thus my changed life expands God, or who he is. What I mean is that since we were created to glorify God, and magnify God, then our lives coming into line with what he made us to be is more of a benefit to all of heaven, the dwelling place of God.
ReplyDeleteOne thing that is really impressing me lately is that in order for us to be like God, that is to say to know God, or be known of God rather, is that we be Holy as he is holy. This pursuit of holiness is kind of a tricky thing. It starts with the heart, and an attitude of humility, so that the Holy Spirit can lead us and guide us into all holiness. When you study the old testament you find that it is through obedience that holiness is achieved. So in reality we are incapable of being holy without listening to what the Holy Spirit is telling us to do. He might tell us to take off our shoes, for where we are standing is holy ground. He might tell you to do surgery to a specific part of your body, or he might even ask you to go kill something and pour the blood on a gold box. The thing is, that we must do exactly as he asks us to do, otherwise we are trying to do it in our own efforts. This was the fatal mistake of God's first chosen king of Israel.
To be holy we must first know God's holy laws, then we must understand them, and what the intent of what they are trying to convey. As we spend time meditating on his laws we are drawn closer to him, all the while waiting for what he is going to initiate. To try to pre-empt God is disastrous, we must be willing to do the absurd if necessary. Only God, and his Holy Spirit know how to be holy and the more willing we are to follow him, on the time schedule that he has, the closer we are to knowing him, or to be known of him. It's all about him, not us.
I've also been wondering a little bit about what the people of those old times had to do in their ritualistic sacrifices, which of course are no longer required since Jesus is our sacrifice, and the only one that God will accept. Most of us Christians go about our day to day living without giving a thought to whether we should sacrifice something or not, and for what reason a sacrifice should be made. If we compare our lives to that of those early followers of God, we would probably be surprised to find that we are rather quite consumed by our own desire to fulfill our agenda for the day. I'm not saying that we should be actually thinking of going back to animal sacrifice, but that we should take the same reverend approach to sacrificing our hearts so that we can be less of ourselves and more in tune with him. (continued in next comment; this thing only allows 4096 characters)
(here's the rest of my comment):
ReplyDeleteThe reason I put these two thoughts together, is that I believe most Christians are not even aware that they are not truly following God. I think ignorance and blindness have reached an epidemic in the Church. Just ask someone, a believer to quote the ten commandments; challenge yourself to recite them, you might be surprised you have a hard time with the exact wording, or being able to put them in order. But my point is that if we are going to define what holy living is, or holiness, then how far off course do we go? But if we are truly interested in seeking God's righteousness, according to how he defines holiness, then we must be willing to really sit down and scrutinize what his requirements are, then be willing to do it. Take for example the fifth commandment of honouring your father and mother. It seems quite straight forward, but yet so many Christians have failed in this area. As a father I am finding the daily sacrifice I make for my little son, which is taken for granted by him, to be very humbling when I consider the same sacrifice was made by my own father for me. When I was too young to understand his tireless efforts, he did for me what I could not do for myself. I thank him, and my mother for how much they put themselves at my service just so that I could have this life I now enjoy. I truely want so much to honour my father, and my mother, the sad reality is that there are those who have not only ignored this duty, but have broken God's holy commandment in doing so. All in ignorance. James wrote that if we keep the whole law and break one small point, we are guilty of breaking them all, so that would make us a murderer, and an adulterer, and a thief, a profaner of God's holy name, an idolater, full of covetousness, and unholiness. This is the real reason that I see that many in the Church are living a form of godliness, but denying the power thereof.
I really enjoyed that CD "Rescued" by John Bevere, that you sent us Sara, as it paints a grim picture of what reality there might be awaiting some believers. But I must also remember what the word of God says, to temper how we feel. While we might be scared to death of the prospect of an eternity without God, we must also believe that it is by faith that we come to God. Romans 14:22, 23 remind us that if we doubt we are lost. I am comforted by two things that I know. First that he which began a good work in me is quite capable to complete it(Phil. 1:6). This is his work, not mine; I follow him, and obey his voice. This is the pathway that leads to heaven. And the second is that the fruit which we bear proves whose we are. A good tree cannot bring forth evil fruit, neither can a corrupt tree bring forth good fruit....wherefore by their fruits you shall know them (Matt. 7:18,20). If we are followers of God, we will listen to every word that the Holy Spirit teaches us, and we will be humble enough to do them. This is the wise man who built his house upon the rock...he heard these things, and he did them (Matt.7:24). We must be willing to let go of our own definition of holiness so that we can seek his definition, and in it we will find life. Anything else is as you said "filthy rags"(Isaiah 64:6)
Dale Q.
Okay, so I have officially read all your latest blogs now - this is quite the feat for me (as it is hard to read anything longer than a few sentences in between the demands)- and I gotta say - I love you - you are GREAT! I so connect with all you have to say - your spiritual musings, digging deeper to really what it's all about - not just the RULES! - to your heart for kids, kids that don't fit and are hurting, to your love and joy for your kids and husband, to your struggles yet conviction in homeschooling. I am so glad I know you. You are a kindred spirit! I was not a naughty child, but I certainly didn't fit in and wasn't "good" either.
ReplyDeleteAnyways, I have a blog too - don't know if you ever found it - it is called "A Barefooted Soul" I think it's on blogger (or is it blogspot, or are they the same? Yeah - I have trouble finding my car in the parking lot!!) Check it out! My latest blog entry has words of wisdom that your parents gave me!!
Lisa C.